Last Monday, we all trooped to BSA Towers' Upper Penthouse to finally meet the Carbonell family for the first time (for most of us). By all, I mean the whole Dizon family. Only Bric was missing in action because he wasn't able to nap in the afternoon. So, there we all were, on top of a building, two families meeting for the first time, while rain drizzled outside.
The Carbonells are a funny bunch. Kalog, loud, very open and funny. A lot like our family too. After the night was over, I actually had a sore throat from all the laughing and shouting. It was fun!
Thanks to Zhar for the dinner which could've been served warmer (attention Ponzo's!) and for the fun time we had with your family. I'm sure Rod's wish will be granted - that our two families will have a close and lasting relationship. Again, we look forward to our completed sisterhood... as if hindi ka pa welcome no! Hehehe...
Marriage is a beautiful thing. Not only is it a union of two souls joined together by love, it is also a coming together of two families, establishing a connection because of the love of two people. "Strangers", now families, all bound through love.
To the Carbonells, it was a pleasure meeting you. Till the next 'family' gathering!
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
Saturday, September 22, 2007
Housemates
It's been weeks since Ate, Japa and their kids moved in with us in La Vista. Their house is undergoing a major renovation, and I hope it will still be some time before the house gets fixed. Hehehe.... It's just more fun with more 'housemates' here in this huuuge house; moreso, with family housemates of brothers and sisters.
Bric's morning ritual includes an additional stop in the Gavino's Family Room. After waking Lolo Boy and Mamalyn up and greeting them good morning (more like a uh, ah), Bric and yaya go visit the morning family. It's just great that the Gavinos are morning persons. They're up at about the same time Bric is up. As for me and Boydee, well, let's just say we're more like owls. Awake at night, sleepy during the day, well, at least for the early part of the day. We usually wake up at around 9am. So, Bric has bonding time with his cousins who just love the youngest addition among their cousins. Raegan, Rogan and Raine know how to make Bric laugh, not that it takes a lot to do that. Even Ranger plays with Bric sometimes. Bric has gotten attached to Ate Rona and Japa, always making sure they make him pansin whenever they're around.
It wasn't a few years back when Rondic, Lai and their brood were also here. Those were fun times too, with usually midnight snacks at almost every weekend. Reese would be a frequent visitor then.
I just love it when our brotherhood and sisterhood are here. It just makes the house more 'homey' and meal times more 'alive'. So, to the workers doing the Gavino house, take your sweet time.... but don't up the labor and price! Hehehe.... As for the Gavinos, we LOVE having you here!!!
Bric's morning ritual includes an additional stop in the Gavino's Family Room. After waking Lolo Boy and Mamalyn up and greeting them good morning (more like a uh, ah), Bric and yaya go visit the morning family. It's just great that the Gavinos are morning persons. They're up at about the same time Bric is up. As for me and Boydee, well, let's just say we're more like owls. Awake at night, sleepy during the day, well, at least for the early part of the day. We usually wake up at around 9am. So, Bric has bonding time with his cousins who just love the youngest addition among their cousins. Raegan, Rogan and Raine know how to make Bric laugh, not that it takes a lot to do that. Even Ranger plays with Bric sometimes. Bric has gotten attached to Ate Rona and Japa, always making sure they make him pansin whenever they're around.
It wasn't a few years back when Rondic, Lai and their brood were also here. Those were fun times too, with usually midnight snacks at almost every weekend. Reese would be a frequent visitor then.
I just love it when our brotherhood and sisterhood are here. It just makes the house more 'homey' and meal times more 'alive'. So, to the workers doing the Gavino house, take your sweet time.... but don't up the labor and price! Hehehe.... As for the Gavinos, we LOVE having you here!!!
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
Caught With His Hand in the Cookie Jar
The headlines in the newspapers these days are all about the involvement of Commissioner on Elections Chair Benjamin Abalos on the controversial and highly disadvantageous broadband contract with China's ZTE.
Once again, Abalos is in the limelight and right at the forefront of blatant corruption and yet, he still manages to smile in front of the cameras and in effect, the Filipino people, and deny the allegations and accusations. Even if he is literally caught with his hand in the cookie jar, he still can lie and squirm his way out of the mess and seemingly come out "clean" and "free"! Of course, if you're talking about at least P10million pesos inside the cookie jar, among other things which may not have been exposed yet, then, you can pay anyone to defend you, or ask others to look the other way.
In the Philippines, our justice is relative, based 'on popular demand', and highly dependent on who is in power at the moment. Our government, which is supposed to serve, is ruled by people who are out to make a fast buck to the detriment of the people. Our so-called leaders are no longer concerned about values such as honor, dignity and reputation, because what drives them is self-enrichment.
So even if you're the leader of the land and thus the guardian of the 80-million Filipinos, you don't really care if good morals and values are being lived and upheld by your subordinates. Who are you to care when you're blinded by greed and thirsty for power?
Power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely. Abalos has the daring to lie and wiggle his way out because he knows he has a strong backer. Mike Arroyo, the 'father' of the Philippines, despite a wake up call on his conscience via a heart operation, still has not learned his lesson. GMA, whether aware or not of her husband's dealings, still looks the other way. Silence is tantamount to support. Three leaders of our country. Three obvious examples of why our country is not going anywhere, except down under.
Let them have three more years of stealing, cheating and lying. Their actions will catch up with them. Even if our justice system is ruled by people; there is but One judge for all. Unbiased and untainted, God will hold them accountable. They will have their day in court. Perhaps not now, not soon; not in our local courts; but there where it really matters. If only the Filipinos can witness that, will we have a field day seeing them wiggle their way out of this one!
Once again, Abalos is in the limelight and right at the forefront of blatant corruption and yet, he still manages to smile in front of the cameras and in effect, the Filipino people, and deny the allegations and accusations. Even if he is literally caught with his hand in the cookie jar, he still can lie and squirm his way out of the mess and seemingly come out "clean" and "free"! Of course, if you're talking about at least P10million pesos inside the cookie jar, among other things which may not have been exposed yet, then, you can pay anyone to defend you, or ask others to look the other way.
In the Philippines, our justice is relative, based 'on popular demand', and highly dependent on who is in power at the moment. Our government, which is supposed to serve, is ruled by people who are out to make a fast buck to the detriment of the people. Our so-called leaders are no longer concerned about values such as honor, dignity and reputation, because what drives them is self-enrichment.
So even if you're the leader of the land and thus the guardian of the 80-million Filipinos, you don't really care if good morals and values are being lived and upheld by your subordinates. Who are you to care when you're blinded by greed and thirsty for power?
Power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely. Abalos has the daring to lie and wiggle his way out because he knows he has a strong backer. Mike Arroyo, the 'father' of the Philippines, despite a wake up call on his conscience via a heart operation, still has not learned his lesson. GMA, whether aware or not of her husband's dealings, still looks the other way. Silence is tantamount to support. Three leaders of our country. Three obvious examples of why our country is not going anywhere, except down under.
Let them have three more years of stealing, cheating and lying. Their actions will catch up with them. Even if our justice system is ruled by people; there is but One judge for all. Unbiased and untainted, God will hold them accountable. They will have their day in court. Perhaps not now, not soon; not in our local courts; but there where it really matters. If only the Filipinos can witness that, will we have a field day seeing them wiggle their way out of this one!
Denied!!!
After the novena to St. Therese and a rosary, our yaya Mila still got denied of her US Visa application. Surprisingly, I didn't feel as devastated as expected. I also have not lost faith nor felt disappointment towards God just because my petitions were not granted. That would be too shallow and lame. Instead, I am looking at the brighter side of things. As my sisters, Ate Rona and Lai texted, it is an opportunity for me and Boydee to bond with our adorable Bric!
The burden would most likely fall on Boydee's hands especially since I will be heavy on my 7th month of pregnancy all the way till I give birth. And Mommy Nonie and her friends are already telling me that I shouldn't even be carrying Bric too much and for too long since I'm in that delicate stage. But how can I resist my baby when he looks at me or reaches for me?!? I have to admit that carrying him too long is kinda strenuous. He is after all already 20 pounds!!! So, good luck to me and most especially Boydee.
I am comforted that when I am about to give birth, my Mom would fly to LA to be with us. Hopefully, so will Mommy Shalene and my four-time-mothers sisters. Hehehe....
While Boydee and I will think of other ways to let Mila be issued a Visa, if and when all possibilities are exhausted, or none will present itself, then we will have to face the music. Leaving Bric behind is out of the question. We will bring our baby along... and trust that all will go well, and that we can handle him especially when he's super playful. (Perhaps by that time, he can already walk... and fast!) If we get through this, we can get through anything. Hehe... And when we all get back with our 2 babies, we will be a closer, more bonded family.
The burden would most likely fall on Boydee's hands especially since I will be heavy on my 7th month of pregnancy all the way till I give birth. And Mommy Nonie and her friends are already telling me that I shouldn't even be carrying Bric too much and for too long since I'm in that delicate stage. But how can I resist my baby when he looks at me or reaches for me?!? I have to admit that carrying him too long is kinda strenuous. He is after all already 20 pounds!!! So, good luck to me and most especially Boydee.
I am comforted that when I am about to give birth, my Mom would fly to LA to be with us. Hopefully, so will Mommy Shalene and my four-time-mothers sisters. Hehehe....
While Boydee and I will think of other ways to let Mila be issued a Visa, if and when all possibilities are exhausted, or none will present itself, then we will have to face the music. Leaving Bric behind is out of the question. We will bring our baby along... and trust that all will go well, and that we can handle him especially when he's super playful. (Perhaps by that time, he can already walk... and fast!) If we get through this, we can get through anything. Hehe... And when we all get back with our 2 babies, we will be a closer, more bonded family.
Monday, September 17, 2007
Tomorrow's D Day
Tomorrow, at 1:30 pm, our Yaya Mila is scheduled to be interviewed at the US Embassy. We are applying for a US Visa for her so she can go with us to the States when I give birth to our 2nd baby. Hopefully, God willing, she will be issued a US Visa. Pleeaassssssssssssseeeeeeeeee....
We've actually grown so spoiled by Yaya Mila, it's embarrassing. Hehehe.... But for all the time and care she's given Bric, we really are just so thankful. Of course, that is her job, but still, there are some nannies out there who are just diligent when someone else is around, but when no one else is watching, she becomes neglectful. I feel Mila really cares and has grown attached with Bric, whether we're there or not. Hopefully, this is for keeps.
Speaking of our baby, he has grown so fast! How time flies. He now has 2 bottom teeth; can crawl 'snake-like'; giggles, as usual; clings and reaches out to people; cries when someone dear leaves; knows 'where's the light?', 'appear' and 'close-open'; his byes are an inverted wave with matching close-open of the hands. He's so much heavier and very full. Oh, we just love our baby!!!
We've actually grown so spoiled by Yaya Mila, it's embarrassing. Hehehe.... But for all the time and care she's given Bric, we really are just so thankful. Of course, that is her job, but still, there are some nannies out there who are just diligent when someone else is around, but when no one else is watching, she becomes neglectful. I feel Mila really cares and has grown attached with Bric, whether we're there or not. Hopefully, this is for keeps.
Speaking of our baby, he has grown so fast! How time flies. He now has 2 bottom teeth; can crawl 'snake-like'; giggles, as usual; clings and reaches out to people; cries when someone dear leaves; knows 'where's the light?', 'appear' and 'close-open'; his byes are an inverted wave with matching close-open of the hands. He's so much heavier and very full. Oh, we just love our baby!!!
Wednesday, September 12, 2007
Lost in the Heat of the Moment
Just had an emotionally draining conversation with my brother. What he expected to be an understanding sister on the other end of the line turned out to be the outspoken, tactless monster. That was me! That’s how I turned out.
Discussing about his upcoming plan became an exchange of heated, emotional words, bordering even on drama. Out of frustration at not being able to express myself, I let out an uncalled for statement. Totally wrong statement, and now that I look back, something I totally regret. I didn’t mean it to come out that way. What I meant to say was for him to please, please think things over and not arrive at a decision simply because that’s what your heart tells you to do. But what came out were those hurtful words. Of course, he didn’t let that slip. Of course, if I were him, I also wouldn’t, and would, of course, take offense.
I realize that in many conversations we have with other people, especially people most dear to us, when discussing topics that are ‘delicate’ and ‘sensitive’ and, in this case, ‘high risk’, an exchange of words may be unavoidable. Because emotions are high, we may let out words that are hurtful, but aren’t totally meant; we may say things but state it the wrong, hurtful way. What gets lost in the heat of the moment are actually what is in our hearts.
And in our heart of hearts, what we really want to say is, we are really just concerned for your welfare and your family’s, we love you; because, really, if we didn’t love you, we wouldn’t be that emotional and frantic and paranoid.
But then again, if we had approached it more calmly and rationally and less emotionally, then those words which I want so much to take back wouldn’t have been said at all. And if there were total trust, the whole conversation would’ve been just a confirmation, not a confrontation.
For now, I’ve said my sorrys, although I know that what I said isn’t easily forgivable and forgettable. I shall sit in misery as I deal with my guilt and remorse. But then I should move on, forgive myself and hope my dear brother will forgive me. After all, when all is said and done, blood IS thicker than water.
Discussing about his upcoming plan became an exchange of heated, emotional words, bordering even on drama. Out of frustration at not being able to express myself, I let out an uncalled for statement. Totally wrong statement, and now that I look back, something I totally regret. I didn’t mean it to come out that way. What I meant to say was for him to please, please think things over and not arrive at a decision simply because that’s what your heart tells you to do. But what came out were those hurtful words. Of course, he didn’t let that slip. Of course, if I were him, I also wouldn’t, and would, of course, take offense.
I realize that in many conversations we have with other people, especially people most dear to us, when discussing topics that are ‘delicate’ and ‘sensitive’ and, in this case, ‘high risk’, an exchange of words may be unavoidable. Because emotions are high, we may let out words that are hurtful, but aren’t totally meant; we may say things but state it the wrong, hurtful way. What gets lost in the heat of the moment are actually what is in our hearts.
And in our heart of hearts, what we really want to say is, we are really just concerned for your welfare and your family’s, we love you; because, really, if we didn’t love you, we wouldn’t be that emotional and frantic and paranoid.
But then again, if we had approached it more calmly and rationally and less emotionally, then those words which I want so much to take back wouldn’t have been said at all. And if there were total trust, the whole conversation would’ve been just a confirmation, not a confrontation.
For now, I’ve said my sorrys, although I know that what I said isn’t easily forgivable and forgettable. I shall sit in misery as I deal with my guilt and remorse. But then I should move on, forgive myself and hope my dear brother will forgive me. After all, when all is said and done, blood IS thicker than water.
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
Still As Special
I had my ultrasound today. I am now almost 4 months pregnant and so far, still have the same weight at **secret**! Hahaha....
Admittedly, I am not as 'careful' and watchful of my diet, as when I was pregnant the first time. Perhaps, it's because I already know what to expect. In fact, praise God, I didn't spot on my 1st trimester, nor did I faint. I had dizzying spells, and a few mild nauseous moments, but otherwise, I am so 'normal', maybe because my body has recently just gone through this whole cycle, it's still fresh in its memory. So, it's easier to adjust.
It kinda makes me guilty that I am not as studious and as super excited and expectant as my 1st but that doesn't mean this baby is less precious.
When I saw her (hopefully!!!), she was still small but she moved a lot. There is always that feeling of awe when you see that there is actually a life growing inside you. It is just so magical and humbling. Imagine, God giving and entrusting His own child to an unworthy person such as I. How can we be so blessed?!?
Each pregnancy is special and unique, even if the excitement is seemingly less. Each baby is a blessing and precious gift. And we eagerly await the coming of our 2nd, just as we were excited with our 1st. Hopefully, we will be blessed with a normal, healthy, strong, intelligent, loving and beautiful (or handsome) baby!
Admittedly, I am not as 'careful' and watchful of my diet, as when I was pregnant the first time. Perhaps, it's because I already know what to expect. In fact, praise God, I didn't spot on my 1st trimester, nor did I faint. I had dizzying spells, and a few mild nauseous moments, but otherwise, I am so 'normal', maybe because my body has recently just gone through this whole cycle, it's still fresh in its memory. So, it's easier to adjust.
It kinda makes me guilty that I am not as studious and as super excited and expectant as my 1st but that doesn't mean this baby is less precious.
When I saw her (hopefully!!!), she was still small but she moved a lot. There is always that feeling of awe when you see that there is actually a life growing inside you. It is just so magical and humbling. Imagine, God giving and entrusting His own child to an unworthy person such as I. How can we be so blessed?!?
Each pregnancy is special and unique, even if the excitement is seemingly less. Each baby is a blessing and precious gift. And we eagerly await the coming of our 2nd, just as we were excited with our 1st. Hopefully, we will be blessed with a normal, healthy, strong, intelligent, loving and beautiful (or handsome) baby!
Friday, August 10, 2007
Pregnant Again!
Last July 4, I invited Boydee to witness my pregnancy test, just the basic P99 per box Medic pregnancy test kit. I had a feeling I was pregnant because I was just so hungry for sleep. Imagine 10 hours a day!!!
So, there we were by the bathroom sink. A few drops after, the test registered two lines. We were stumped! We looked at each other with mixed emotions and Boydee said, "You're pregnant!!! You'll be a mommy again!" I didn't know how to react that time. I was just so surprised that it came to us that soon, that easy. Dr. Artenos said we could try making a baby within 6 months to a year. On our 6th month, I texted Dr. Mitch if we could start trying. She said, "ok". Little did we know that we'd get it on our first few tries.
I was quite scared for my stitch more than anything else. I wanted to go for a natural child birth, the second time around, but if I gave birth this soon, would a natural delivery be possible without my scar giving in? How could I give equal attention to Bric and our new baby?
After a visit to Dr. Mitch and several "interviews" with Moms who had c/s operations and kids right after, I felt a little more comfortable with my pregnancy. They reassured me that no harm will happen to the baby inside me, and that no harm will keep to me. The worst thing that can happen is for my scar to tear in the latter part of the pregnancy when I'm just about full term. I just have to be carefully monitored during the last trimester.
Worries put aside, I am happy and excited for the next baby. We pray God will gift us with a baby girl this time around. Then, perhaps, Boydee and I can rest in that department.
This pregnancy came so fast, so soon. We are still quite amazed at how God has blessed us. Every once in a while, I worry if something should go wrong. But I am comforted. God has willed it that we be sent another angel in our lives, who are we to question His will? We can only be very grateful and trust that everything is according to His plan. We are but His instruments. I know He will be with me, with us in this interesting phase in our lives, just as He was so present when I was carrying Bric in me.
We will continue praying for a normal, healthy, complication-less, safe and happy pregnancy and delivery; and for a normal, healthy, strong, happy, beautiful (if girl, hopefully, please let it be a girl.... hehehe...) or handsome (if boy), intelligent, kind-hearted baby who will grow up enjoying God's friendship. We also pray that Bric and Baby 2 will get along. Amen! :)
So, there we were by the bathroom sink. A few drops after, the test registered two lines. We were stumped! We looked at each other with mixed emotions and Boydee said, "You're pregnant!!! You'll be a mommy again!" I didn't know how to react that time. I was just so surprised that it came to us that soon, that easy. Dr. Artenos said we could try making a baby within 6 months to a year. On our 6th month, I texted Dr. Mitch if we could start trying. She said, "ok". Little did we know that we'd get it on our first few tries.
I was quite scared for my stitch more than anything else. I wanted to go for a natural child birth, the second time around, but if I gave birth this soon, would a natural delivery be possible without my scar giving in? How could I give equal attention to Bric and our new baby?
After a visit to Dr. Mitch and several "interviews" with Moms who had c/s operations and kids right after, I felt a little more comfortable with my pregnancy. They reassured me that no harm will happen to the baby inside me, and that no harm will keep to me. The worst thing that can happen is for my scar to tear in the latter part of the pregnancy when I'm just about full term. I just have to be carefully monitored during the last trimester.
Worries put aside, I am happy and excited for the next baby. We pray God will gift us with a baby girl this time around. Then, perhaps, Boydee and I can rest in that department.
This pregnancy came so fast, so soon. We are still quite amazed at how God has blessed us. Every once in a while, I worry if something should go wrong. But I am comforted. God has willed it that we be sent another angel in our lives, who are we to question His will? We can only be very grateful and trust that everything is according to His plan. We are but His instruments. I know He will be with me, with us in this interesting phase in our lives, just as He was so present when I was carrying Bric in me.
We will continue praying for a normal, healthy, complication-less, safe and happy pregnancy and delivery; and for a normal, healthy, strong, happy, beautiful (if girl, hopefully, please let it be a girl.... hehehe...) or handsome (if boy), intelligent, kind-hearted baby who will grow up enjoying God's friendship. We also pray that Bric and Baby 2 will get along. Amen! :)
Tuesday, August 07, 2007
Happy Birthday Love!!!
It was a Mexican Fiesta themed party we threw for Boydee as he turned 37 yesterday. As is typical of our family, nothing can spoil our spirits for as long as there's good food and great company. So, when the rain started pouring on the poor jet-lagged lechon that we flew in from Cebu, we decided to move all the dishes which was set up in the tent in the garden to the Lanai area. So, our Mexican hats and my precious food labels didn't achieve their purpose! But as I said, it was still fun as we all gamely dressed up in ponchos and cowboy costumes and Tito Lito's cooking weaved all of us into a Mexican spell!
Our buffet table consisted of the following:
Rejy's Seven Layered Dip
P.S. Boydee and Ate Rona share the same birthday, so.... HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU TOO ATE RONA!!! WE LOVE YOU!!! Ate spent her birthday in the States so she wasn't here with us to celebrate. She would've LOVED the Mexican spread here. WE MISSED YOU!
Our buffet table consisted of the following:
Rejy's Seven Layered Dip
Nachos w/ 3 Kinds of Salsa-Tita San's, Jack's and Mango Salsa (the latter 2 bought in the US)
California Mango with Shrimp Paste
Quesadilla with Meat from the LV kitchen
Quesadilla from the LV kitchen
Taco Salad by Tito Lito
Rondic's Chicken Wings ala Hooters
Shrimp and Chicken Fajita by Tito Lito
Balbacua by Tito Lito
Mexican Rice by Tito Lito
Burrito
Lechon de Cebu from Rico's, my supplier in Cebu
Tocino del Cielo from Des Rodriguez - discovery of Lai in Salcedo Village Market
Caramel & Brownie Bars from the LV kitchen
Lemon Torte from Rod & Zhar
Cherry Cheesecake from Anabelle
California Mango with Shrimp Paste
Quesadilla with Meat from the LV kitchen
Quesadilla from the LV kitchen
Taco Salad by Tito Lito
Rondic's Chicken Wings ala Hooters
Shrimp and Chicken Fajita by Tito Lito
Balbacua by Tito Lito
Mexican Rice by Tito Lito
Burrito
Lechon de Cebu from Rico's, my supplier in Cebu
Tocino del Cielo from Des Rodriguez - discovery of Lai in Salcedo Village Market
Caramel & Brownie Bars from the LV kitchen
Lemon Torte from Rod & Zhar
Cherry Cheesecake from Anabelle
Of course, after seconds and third helpings, we were all stuffed. Then we sang Happy Birthday to my dear hubby. A few hours after, we called it a night.
I have to thank those who helped in their own little and big ways in staging the themed party. So, muchas gracias to Tito Lito for efficiently and generously sharing his culinary talents as he whipped up the dishes for our feast and downloaded Mexican songs as if a real Mariachi band were playing; to Rejita for her yummy dip and for her artistic skills in painting the hats and decorating the tent; Zhar, Rod, Raegan, Raine and RJ for painting the colorful, festive hats; Elizza and Zhar again for buying all the materials needed for the decors and for being excited about the theme; Rondic for cooking the chicken wings which was a huge hit!; Mommy and Boydee for shopping for the ingredients needed from the US and bringing them here; the LV staff for helping out; and all our guests for the gifts and being part of Boydee's celebration.
Lastly, I can not thank God enough for the gift of Boydee in our lives, in my life!!! I thank Him for making him the way he is; and for choosing, of all the billions of people in this world, him to be the man I should spend the rest of my life with, and with whom I would raise a family with.
To Boydee, I love you. That simple word sums it all up for me, love. My heart is yours to keep forever; my whole lifetime is devoted to you and our children for always. Thank you for being born for me and making my life a kaleidoscope of beautiful memories and experiences!
Lastly, I can not thank God enough for the gift of Boydee in our lives, in my life!!! I thank Him for making him the way he is; and for choosing, of all the billions of people in this world, him to be the man I should spend the rest of my life with, and with whom I would raise a family with.
To Boydee, I love you. That simple word sums it all up for me, love. My heart is yours to keep forever; my whole lifetime is devoted to you and our children for always. Thank you for being born for me and making my life a kaleidoscope of beautiful memories and experiences!
P.S. Boydee and Ate Rona share the same birthday, so.... HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU TOO ATE RONA!!! WE LOVE YOU!!! Ate spent her birthday in the States so she wasn't here with us to celebrate. She would've LOVED the Mexican spread here. WE MISSED YOU!
Friday, August 03, 2007
The Looong Wait Is Over
Just a few hours more and Bric and I will be on our way to the airport to meet the most important man in our lives. After three exruciatingly long weeks, my Love and Bric's Daddy will finally be with us, and we'll be a complete family again.
It's funny, though. As the day draws nearer, I find the waiting seem longer, unlike in the past weeks he was gone. I presume this is because the anxiety and excitement is already there so it's harder to keep it in. So, I pray to God, He brings Boydee home to us safe and sound where we'll be waiting to welcome him with all our love.
Even if we were alone, Bric and I weren't lonely. First of all, we had each other and he had his yaya also. Hehehe... Secondly, thank God for family!!!! I am so indebted to Rondic and Lai, Rodney and Zhar for keeping me company all these days. We had numerous bonding sessions, usually dining out or hanging out in the house. Once, they even had to be Bric's babysitter in Ponzo's while I was attending the dry run of St. Alphonsus Parish's Dedication Rites and Yaya Mila was on her day off. Super duper thanks to my siblings!!! I super love you!!! Hehehe....
Thirdly, thanks to our extended family... Tito Lito, the Sargan kids, RJ, Robin and Rejy, Tito Rey, Tita Tinggoy, Gelo, Avic for making the house not seem empty. Thanks to the lovable Gavino kids too for keeping my nights and weekends more colorful and 'challenging'. Hahaha... Fourth, our house mates... Marivic, Melinda, Sinny, Ringo, Irene, Roland, Polids and everyone for keeping the La Vista Household in order, despite Mom or Lola's absence. Hehehe... Fifth, me and Lai being the only bosses here in the MVC office, we had lots more work to do (issuing memos, for instance... hehehe... and chairing the ExCom). Sixth, Tita San's passing kept us all preoccupied with grief and the preparation of the wake, etc... :( (Although this event made me miss Boydee more. I'm sure he would have wanted so much to be here, too.) Seventh, my pregnancy makes me so takaw (greedy) with sleep that I usually spend 10 hours a day with my eyes closed; which means I cut down my waking hours. Hehehe... Eighth, Harry Potter kept me busy for a few nights. Hehehe...
It's funny, though. As the day draws nearer, I find the waiting seem longer, unlike in the past weeks he was gone. I presume this is because the anxiety and excitement is already there so it's harder to keep it in. So, I pray to God, He brings Boydee home to us safe and sound where we'll be waiting to welcome him with all our love.
Even if we were alone, Bric and I weren't lonely. First of all, we had each other and he had his yaya also. Hehehe... Secondly, thank God for family!!!! I am so indebted to Rondic and Lai, Rodney and Zhar for keeping me company all these days. We had numerous bonding sessions, usually dining out or hanging out in the house. Once, they even had to be Bric's babysitter in Ponzo's while I was attending the dry run of St. Alphonsus Parish's Dedication Rites and Yaya Mila was on her day off. Super duper thanks to my siblings!!! I super love you!!! Hehehe....
Thirdly, thanks to our extended family... Tito Lito, the Sargan kids, RJ, Robin and Rejy, Tito Rey, Tita Tinggoy, Gelo, Avic for making the house not seem empty. Thanks to the lovable Gavino kids too for keeping my nights and weekends more colorful and 'challenging'. Hahaha... Fourth, our house mates... Marivic, Melinda, Sinny, Ringo, Irene, Roland, Polids and everyone for keeping the La Vista Household in order, despite Mom or Lola's absence. Hehehe... Fifth, me and Lai being the only bosses here in the MVC office, we had lots more work to do (issuing memos, for instance... hehehe... and chairing the ExCom). Sixth, Tita San's passing kept us all preoccupied with grief and the preparation of the wake, etc... :( (Although this event made me miss Boydee more. I'm sure he would have wanted so much to be here, too.) Seventh, my pregnancy makes me so takaw (greedy) with sleep that I usually spend 10 hours a day with my eyes closed; which means I cut down my waking hours. Hehehe... Eighth, Harry Potter kept me busy for a few nights. Hehehe...
Now that Boydee's going to be back soon, I'll miss having to sleep with Bric beside me. Our nights will be more noisy because Boydee keeps the TV on most times; but it will be complete because we will be all together. Our bonding sessions with our siblings will be more fun (but less juicy... hehehe) because of Boydee's silly antics when he's full. The house will be more homey because I'll have my partner back; and my heart and my hand won't be empty anymore because finally, after days and weeks of missing Boydee, he'll finally be back tomorrow morning. Whoopppeeee!!! :D
I love you Love... Welcome home to our loving arms!!! We missed you super!
I love you Love... Welcome home to our loving arms!!! We missed you super!
Wednesday, August 01, 2007
God Is So Alive
I was privileged to have witnessed the Solemn Dedication and Consecration of a church twice this year. First was our very own Shrine of St. Therese of which Boydee and I played active roles in its fruition. Second was yesterday's dedication of the church of which Fr. Benny is the parish priest, the St. Alphonsus de Liguori Parish in Magallanes.
This time around, I was able to concentrate more on the ceremony than its execution (unlike in St. Therese). Despite the long wait, we were asked to go at 4pm but the mass actually started at 5, I was thankful for being there. Despite my aching flat butt and my uneasiness in wearing heels now that I'm almost 3 months pregnant, and despite my hunger, I patiently watched, listened, sang, participated in the 2-hour ceremony of dedicating the newly built church to God.
The whole ceremony was not without its share of long rituals, cute gimmickry (children singing), long, unfamiliar songs with a choir that sad to say had more soloists than the beautiful, pleasing blending of voices (but their song arrangements were really noteworthy!), meaningful speeches, chants, and of course, the usual mass proceedings.
Still, the whole set of unique rituals like the lighting of the altar, consecrating of the altar table, incensing, etc., performed by the Cardinal and his assisting Archbishops and Bishops, with their Master of Ceremonies and other priest concelebrants was amusing and educational to watch. Each ritual had its significance for being part of the whole and I can only thank the Catholic Church for preserving these rites through the ages so that we may get a glimpse of our culture, our history and an appreciation of the richness of our religion.
As HE Gaudencio Cardinal B. Rosales wiped oil on the altar table that was to be consecrated, I could not help but feel so blessed to see and feel God so alive in one place, in the hearts of so many people. This was the birth of a new house of God in its physical aspect, but more than that, this was the re-birth of a community. This was a community intent on re-building the structure that burned down 3 years ago and yesterday, on the feast day of their patron, through the kind and focused leadership of Fr. Benny, a new edifice stands. And you can see in the faces of the people, that there was joy... and fulfillment for being part of something good and something for His glory.
The church is done but the work never stops. Everyday, we are part and instrumental in the building of churches within our community. We may already have the structure but the real church is really its people. We are the church and each one of us is the brick, the hollow block, the nail; and our own construction is an on going thing. But it's not the money that oils the work-in-progress. Oh no! It is the love towards our brothers and sisters; it is our common faith in the Lord Almighty; and it is our commitment and strong resolve to always strive to be good and devout Catholics - all for His glory!!!
Congratulations Father Benny and to the Magallanes community and parishioners!
This time around, I was able to concentrate more on the ceremony than its execution (unlike in St. Therese). Despite the long wait, we were asked to go at 4pm but the mass actually started at 5, I was thankful for being there. Despite my aching flat butt and my uneasiness in wearing heels now that I'm almost 3 months pregnant, and despite my hunger, I patiently watched, listened, sang, participated in the 2-hour ceremony of dedicating the newly built church to God.
The whole ceremony was not without its share of long rituals, cute gimmickry (children singing), long, unfamiliar songs with a choir that sad to say had more soloists than the beautiful, pleasing blending of voices (but their song arrangements were really noteworthy!), meaningful speeches, chants, and of course, the usual mass proceedings.
Still, the whole set of unique rituals like the lighting of the altar, consecrating of the altar table, incensing, etc., performed by the Cardinal and his assisting Archbishops and Bishops, with their Master of Ceremonies and other priest concelebrants was amusing and educational to watch. Each ritual had its significance for being part of the whole and I can only thank the Catholic Church for preserving these rites through the ages so that we may get a glimpse of our culture, our history and an appreciation of the richness of our religion.
As HE Gaudencio Cardinal B. Rosales wiped oil on the altar table that was to be consecrated, I could not help but feel so blessed to see and feel God so alive in one place, in the hearts of so many people. This was the birth of a new house of God in its physical aspect, but more than that, this was the re-birth of a community. This was a community intent on re-building the structure that burned down 3 years ago and yesterday, on the feast day of their patron, through the kind and focused leadership of Fr. Benny, a new edifice stands. And you can see in the faces of the people, that there was joy... and fulfillment for being part of something good and something for His glory.
The church is done but the work never stops. Everyday, we are part and instrumental in the building of churches within our community. We may already have the structure but the real church is really its people. We are the church and each one of us is the brick, the hollow block, the nail; and our own construction is an on going thing. But it's not the money that oils the work-in-progress. Oh no! It is the love towards our brothers and sisters; it is our common faith in the Lord Almighty; and it is our commitment and strong resolve to always strive to be good and devout Catholics - all for His glory!!!
Congratulations Father Benny and to the Magallanes community and parishioners!
Saturday, July 14, 2007
A Final Goodbye
Tita San breathed her last breath on earth yesterday morning at 11:20; and then she slept, and slept, never to wake up again except in heaven. Finally, she can rest... but not after putting up such a great fight.
Rosanna Eloisa Papa Sargan was 50 years old when she passed. She left behind her three children, and her partner of many, many years. She also left us, family and friends, whom she has touched. She left us a void; but she also left with us beautiful memories. And for that we are grateful.
I will always remember her as a woman who lived, loved, and laughed. Here was a woman who embraced life, fought for it until the very end. Here was a woman who loved, totally, unselfishly, selflessly, generously, protectively, fiercely and loyally. Here was a woman who laughed... at life even if times were tough; and smiled; unfailing in making others' lives a more joyful one. She was always one who never ran out of things to say; not that she was talkative. She always just seemed interested to know about people, to put them at ease, to share her own experiences and thoughts. She was open; she was warm; and she was so loving.
To Boydee, she will always be his second Mom, who took care of him when he was in the States studying. Both Tita San and Boydee would tell me that they've gone through a lot together. She would tutor him, help him with his homework, and would always, always prepare his lunch pack for him every single day, without fail. She imposed a curfew on him and disciplined him, just like a mother. She said she was more strict towards him than towards her own children because she owed it to her sister, Mommy Shalene, to take care of Boydee in her absence. But how she loved Boydz and all her nieces and nephews and the partners they chose. Love was always something Tita San had in abundance of and she gave and showed it so often, to so many.
We are very privileged to have been touched by her life and to have been recipients of her love, even if we wish and pray that we could have enjoyed that privilege longer. We thank God for letting our paths cross with hers, for planting her into our family, and for making her such a big part of our lives.
Now, as she journeys towards the better world, we ask God to send His angels to guide her path towards Paradise. Our world will be less animated without her, but we are consoled that we have found yet another ally in heaven who will watch over us. This time, even if we don't see her physically, we know she is there. She's not just in our hearts, she is up there in heaven, spreading her love and the best part is, wherever we go, especially to her kids, we will never be separated from her again. She is here with us; she is free; she is more alive than ever before.
Tita San, friend, sister, daughter, lover, mother, room mate, tita, thank you for the gift of your life on earth. Thank you for the memories. You will be greatly missed... You will never be forgotten. Go, be free, and soar to Heaven where Jesus is waiting to welcome you in His warm embrace. You are in a better place now. We love you!
Rosanna Eloisa Papa Sargan was 50 years old when she passed. She left behind her three children, and her partner of many, many years. She also left us, family and friends, whom she has touched. She left us a void; but she also left with us beautiful memories. And for that we are grateful.
I will always remember her as a woman who lived, loved, and laughed. Here was a woman who embraced life, fought for it until the very end. Here was a woman who loved, totally, unselfishly, selflessly, generously, protectively, fiercely and loyally. Here was a woman who laughed... at life even if times were tough; and smiled; unfailing in making others' lives a more joyful one. She was always one who never ran out of things to say; not that she was talkative. She always just seemed interested to know about people, to put them at ease, to share her own experiences and thoughts. She was open; she was warm; and she was so loving.
To Boydee, she will always be his second Mom, who took care of him when he was in the States studying. Both Tita San and Boydee would tell me that they've gone through a lot together. She would tutor him, help him with his homework, and would always, always prepare his lunch pack for him every single day, without fail. She imposed a curfew on him and disciplined him, just like a mother. She said she was more strict towards him than towards her own children because she owed it to her sister, Mommy Shalene, to take care of Boydee in her absence. But how she loved Boydz and all her nieces and nephews and the partners they chose. Love was always something Tita San had in abundance of and she gave and showed it so often, to so many.
We are very privileged to have been touched by her life and to have been recipients of her love, even if we wish and pray that we could have enjoyed that privilege longer. We thank God for letting our paths cross with hers, for planting her into our family, and for making her such a big part of our lives.
Now, as she journeys towards the better world, we ask God to send His angels to guide her path towards Paradise. Our world will be less animated without her, but we are consoled that we have found yet another ally in heaven who will watch over us. This time, even if we don't see her physically, we know she is there. She's not just in our hearts, she is up there in heaven, spreading her love and the best part is, wherever we go, especially to her kids, we will never be separated from her again. She is here with us; she is free; she is more alive than ever before.
Tita San, friend, sister, daughter, lover, mother, room mate, tita, thank you for the gift of your life on earth. Thank you for the memories. You will be greatly missed... You will never be forgotten. Go, be free, and soar to Heaven where Jesus is waiting to welcome you in His warm embrace. You are in a better place now. We love you!
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
Goodbye for now....
Just came back from dropping Tita Belen and Boydee to the airport with Bric. Boydee will be gone for 3 weeks. We'll miss him sooo much. Boo hoo hoo... :(
While he's away, I plan to use this opportunity to bond more with Bric and devote more time to doing things which I've successfully procrastinated on. I'll also be in the office more because Lai and I will be the only bosses left. Hmmm... should we impose longer lunch hours? Hehehehe... Just kidding! Anyway, here's a tentative list of my to-dos to keep me preoccupied and productive:
1. design Chateau de Busay website - Long overdue, so sisterhood, if you have any ideas!!!
2. design Chateau de Busay's menu - Again, loooooong overdue. Again, sisterhood, ideas are sooo welcome! Although I'm scheduling a photo shoot for the food in Chateau when I go on August. Per Lai, a menu is always more inviting for her if it has pictures of the dishes in it. It makes it easier to visualize. Point taken :)
3. renew my driver's license. This has been expired since October last year.
4. renew Yaya Mila's passport. Since I'm carrying baby number 2 (more in a separate blog), we're planning ahead and thinking of bringing Mila with us to the States, which leads me to the next to-do.
5. apply for Mila's US visa.... wish us luck..... (keeping my fingers and toes crossed!)
6. bank recon in MVC - ok, won't elaborate since Mommy Shalene might think I'm revealing too much :)
7. clean our room!!!! This time, I've asked permission from Boydee to clear out some of his clothes; clothes he hasn't worn for 2 years but are still hanging in his closet. Perhaps by the time he comes back, he'll only have 2 closets left for himself. Bwahahahaha!!!! His advantage is, I don't have too many clothes, so perhaps the closet count will remain the same. Status quo...
8. more office work... Since Randy will be leaving for the US and staying there longer, plus he has an upcoming honeymoon, that's added responsibility for us. To Randy and Stel, have fun!!! :) We'll man the fort!
9. take care of the Gavino kids. Bonding time for me and Raegan, Rogan, Raine and Ranger as I play mommy to them while Japa and Ate are taking a break to celebrate their 10th anniversary as a couple. Happy Anniversary to you both!!! May you continue to be an inspiration of good parenting and cool 'couple-hood'. heheheh....
10. whatever else i can think of or whatever else needs to be done. Of course, part of this will include helping Rod and Zhar with their wedding plans however way they want us involved :), bonding with the remaining brotherhood and sisterhood, spending more time with Tita San, reading with Bric, sleeping with Bric, playing with Bric, taking care of myself for the baby in my tummy...
All these while thinking of and missing my love. All these while counting the days til he comes home in my waiting arms and Bric's warm laughter. Bye for now, Love. See you in 3 weeks... We love you!!!
While he's away, I plan to use this opportunity to bond more with Bric and devote more time to doing things which I've successfully procrastinated on. I'll also be in the office more because Lai and I will be the only bosses left. Hmmm... should we impose longer lunch hours? Hehehehe... Just kidding! Anyway, here's a tentative list of my to-dos to keep me preoccupied and productive:
1. design Chateau de Busay website - Long overdue, so sisterhood, if you have any ideas!!!
2. design Chateau de Busay's menu - Again, loooooong overdue. Again, sisterhood, ideas are sooo welcome! Although I'm scheduling a photo shoot for the food in Chateau when I go on August. Per Lai, a menu is always more inviting for her if it has pictures of the dishes in it. It makes it easier to visualize. Point taken :)
3. renew my driver's license. This has been expired since October last year.
4. renew Yaya Mila's passport. Since I'm carrying baby number 2 (more in a separate blog), we're planning ahead and thinking of bringing Mila with us to the States, which leads me to the next to-do.
5. apply for Mila's US visa.... wish us luck..... (keeping my fingers and toes crossed!)
6. bank recon in MVC - ok, won't elaborate since Mommy Shalene might think I'm revealing too much :)
7. clean our room!!!! This time, I've asked permission from Boydee to clear out some of his clothes; clothes he hasn't worn for 2 years but are still hanging in his closet. Perhaps by the time he comes back, he'll only have 2 closets left for himself. Bwahahahaha!!!! His advantage is, I don't have too many clothes, so perhaps the closet count will remain the same. Status quo...
8. more office work... Since Randy will be leaving for the US and staying there longer, plus he has an upcoming honeymoon, that's added responsibility for us. To Randy and Stel, have fun!!! :) We'll man the fort!
9. take care of the Gavino kids. Bonding time for me and Raegan, Rogan, Raine and Ranger as I play mommy to them while Japa and Ate are taking a break to celebrate their 10th anniversary as a couple. Happy Anniversary to you both!!! May you continue to be an inspiration of good parenting and cool 'couple-hood'. heheheh....
10. whatever else i can think of or whatever else needs to be done. Of course, part of this will include helping Rod and Zhar with their wedding plans however way they want us involved :), bonding with the remaining brotherhood and sisterhood, spending more time with Tita San, reading with Bric, sleeping with Bric, playing with Bric, taking care of myself for the baby in my tummy...
All these while thinking of and missing my love. All these while counting the days til he comes home in my waiting arms and Bric's warm laughter. Bye for now, Love. See you in 3 weeks... We love you!!!
Sunday, June 03, 2007
Yaya-less and Loving It
Today, Yaya Mila went on her day-off to be a wedding godmother to a friend. She left at 9:30 after she fed Bric breakfast and bathed him. I told her I'd be the one to feed him milk and put him to sleep so she can make it in time for her 'date'.
I was actually dreading this day when I would be alone and yaya-less. Boydee went to Taiwan to attend the JCI Asia Pacific Conference and will be back on Monday. I was tempted not to let Mila attend the wedding but at the same time, a small part of me looked forward to having Bric all to myself. Still, the past days, I was hounded by doubts on whether I could handle Bric through an entire day. I had prepared a back up plan of hanging out in Apitong where Yaya Jen and Yaya Dee could watch over Bric, to which Lai readily agreed. (Thanks again, Lai!) Then, there was the idea of letting Zenie and Vicvic substitute as yaya. Boydee also suggested letting Marlyn take over for awhile.
But all the plans were shelved in favor of Bric. I am his mother, I have managed to be without a yaya when he was a baby, and what is a day without a yaya anyway? If we survived the States, what more in the Philippines where family and help is just an intercom away? So, it was me and Bric on this lazy Sunday.
Our routine consisted of eating, sleeping, playing, doing visitation rounds to the family members who are here, watching his Praise Baby vcd, and lots of kissing and carrying. In times when I have to eat upstairs in the dining room, or shower, Yaya Zennie or Irene take over. Today, Bric's been in the arms of Lolo Lito, Yaya Dee and Yaya Jen and under the watch of Raegan and Raine. We've also played with Robyn who was here for a few hours.
It is now 5:15 in the afternoon. At around 6pm, I'll be feeding Bric his solids for dinner. So far, so good. I am actually enjoying our 'us' time, our Mommy and Baby bonding. Thank God Bric is such a happy, no fuss baby. Thank God there are so many people here to help out.
There should be more days like this! I am yaya-less, and I'm loving it.
I was actually dreading this day when I would be alone and yaya-less. Boydee went to Taiwan to attend the JCI Asia Pacific Conference and will be back on Monday. I was tempted not to let Mila attend the wedding but at the same time, a small part of me looked forward to having Bric all to myself. Still, the past days, I was hounded by doubts on whether I could handle Bric through an entire day. I had prepared a back up plan of hanging out in Apitong where Yaya Jen and Yaya Dee could watch over Bric, to which Lai readily agreed. (Thanks again, Lai!) Then, there was the idea of letting Zenie and Vicvic substitute as yaya. Boydee also suggested letting Marlyn take over for awhile.
But all the plans were shelved in favor of Bric. I am his mother, I have managed to be without a yaya when he was a baby, and what is a day without a yaya anyway? If we survived the States, what more in the Philippines where family and help is just an intercom away? So, it was me and Bric on this lazy Sunday.
Our routine consisted of eating, sleeping, playing, doing visitation rounds to the family members who are here, watching his Praise Baby vcd, and lots of kissing and carrying. In times when I have to eat upstairs in the dining room, or shower, Yaya Zennie or Irene take over. Today, Bric's been in the arms of Lolo Lito, Yaya Dee and Yaya Jen and under the watch of Raegan and Raine. We've also played with Robyn who was here for a few hours.
It is now 5:15 in the afternoon. At around 6pm, I'll be feeding Bric his solids for dinner. So far, so good. I am actually enjoying our 'us' time, our Mommy and Baby bonding. Thank God Bric is such a happy, no fuss baby. Thank God there are so many people here to help out.
There should be more days like this! I am yaya-less, and I'm loving it.
Wednesday, May 30, 2007
How Do You Know How to be a Mother?
It's been several days since the Solemn Dedication and Consecration of the Shrine of St. Therese, May 17 to be exact, but up to today, I still haven't found my groove in getting back to work, nor found my mojo for digiscrapping and blogging. It seemed that all the pressure and stress leading to that event had died down all of a sudden and left me lost and disoriented. After having been the focus of months of preparation, it ended in one single day. I am relieved but I miss the 'stress', the adrenaline rush and the thrill of organizing an event. So, now, I'm slowly picking up the pieces and trying to find my old rhythm.
Mommy Nonie sent me pictures of her grandparents, a family portrait and a beach outing. She wanted us (the sisterhood) to clean and polish it since most of the pictures had 'age spots' and creases already. Lai cleaned the family portrait (thanks Sis!) and I was left with three. I decided to do it myself. After the Inauguration, I worked on that since Mom was asking me to rush it all in time for her Mom's birthday this July 17. Her voice cracked a bit when she said it's the first time they'll be celebrating their Mom's birthday after so many years. Although I could not relate, I can only imagine what it must have been like to lose a Mom during those growing up years.
My Mom's mom, therefore my grandmother, died when she gave birth to Mom's youngest sister, Auntie Aning. Mom was the eldest of the brood of seven. Since she was the oldest, she probably had the most memories of Mommy Anita.
During our casual talks, she would fondly speak of how her mother used to sew only the "in" clothes for her. Her Mom was a trendsetter and was, even in their time, a feminist. She was very capable and able - managing her time between work and raising a family. Mom also said she was very pretty; robust but pretty. Judging from the pictures, I have to agree.
When her Mom passed away, their siblings were 'distributed' and willingly taken in by their Uncles and Aunts - brothers and sisters of Angkong Teodoro and Ama Anita. They grew up with family but not their own. Mom practically grew up with her grandmother. Angko (my grand aunt Engracia, sister of Angkong) is considered by my Mom as a mother to her too. So, although she didn't grow up in a typical family setting, I'd like to believe she grew up surrounded with love too. (Thank God for relatives!!!)
Now that I am a mother, I look back at how my own Mom raised me. How did she know what to do, how to raise us, what to teach, what discipline style to use? I can only imagine what it must have been like for my Mom. She didn't grow up with a mother to take care of her, no mom to help her decide what clothes to wear, no Mom to talk to when suitors came knocking, no Mom to share joys and heartaches with. There was no mom who can guide her and set an example of how to raise children, no mom to protect her when the world becomes too harsh. And yet, despite not having her own mother as an example of how to be a Mom, she still managed to become such a great Mom to us and even to our friends.
When we were younger, she would feed us breakfast one minute, then be off to our office (which was just next door) the next minute. She would bring us to and pick us up from our schools. She was my hairstylist when I was below ten years old. She used to cut it as if she had the pope's round hat on my head as her pattern. My hair looked like a bagul (coconut) and being that I wasn't exactly the prettiest girl then, I was usually mistaken for a boy in my kindergarten days.
She was the disciplinarian, and me being somehow the one who needed the most discipline, was always the one being scolded (which led my young mind to think I was adopted! hehehe). So to me, she was my Hitler, yet I was sooo attached to her. When she'd leave town a few days, I would cry every single day. I used to have this nightmare as a kid of her leaving us, oh how my heart broke to think about it then.
Things took a turn for the better in my teen age years. I think maybe Mom thought she had house-trained me well enough already. We weren't just mother and daughter; we were friends.
Through the years, especially after God called back my Dad, Mom and I became the best of friends. She was my fashion consultant, my constant companion, my harshest critic and loyal adviser. I talked to her about anything and everything. We travelled together, dined, shopped, watched movies, plays and concerts, ballroom danced, and so much more. In her trying moments, I was her sounding board.
Not exactly graduated from being a mom, she is also now a beloved grand mother to Miggy, Audrey and Bric. But as she always says, you never stop being a mother... even when all of us are married, even if we're miles apart.
Mommy Nonie learned how to be a Mom when she had us. I, too, will have my turn to learn more about motherhood as I continue my journey with Bric and our future kids. There are no clear cut rules nor black and white guidelines when it comes to raising your children. Having lived with, and having been raised by my Mom has armed me with a free demonstration on how to be a mother. I just know I will be a better Mom because I have Mom's example to copy from.
Motherhood isn't only learned by example. Nor can it be mastered through textbooks or lectures from so-called psychologists or experts. Motherhood can be taught, theoretically. But in actuality, to be a mother, one just has to trust her inner voice, listen closely to her own and her child's heart, and let her maternal instincts take over.
I asked Mom how she knew how to raise us. She simply replied: You just have to raise them with LOVE. All the rest will follow.
That will be how I intend to raise our children.
Mommy Nonie sent me pictures of her grandparents, a family portrait and a beach outing. She wanted us (the sisterhood) to clean and polish it since most of the pictures had 'age spots' and creases already. Lai cleaned the family portrait (thanks Sis!) and I was left with three. I decided to do it myself. After the Inauguration, I worked on that since Mom was asking me to rush it all in time for her Mom's birthday this July 17. Her voice cracked a bit when she said it's the first time they'll be celebrating their Mom's birthday after so many years. Although I could not relate, I can only imagine what it must have been like to lose a Mom during those growing up years.
My Mom's mom, therefore my grandmother, died when she gave birth to Mom's youngest sister, Auntie Aning. Mom was the eldest of the brood of seven. Since she was the oldest, she probably had the most memories of Mommy Anita.
During our casual talks, she would fondly speak of how her mother used to sew only the "in" clothes for her. Her Mom was a trendsetter and was, even in their time, a feminist. She was very capable and able - managing her time between work and raising a family. Mom also said she was very pretty; robust but pretty. Judging from the pictures, I have to agree.
When her Mom passed away, their siblings were 'distributed' and willingly taken in by their Uncles and Aunts - brothers and sisters of Angkong Teodoro and Ama Anita. They grew up with family but not their own. Mom practically grew up with her grandmother. Angko (my grand aunt Engracia, sister of Angkong) is considered by my Mom as a mother to her too. So, although she didn't grow up in a typical family setting, I'd like to believe she grew up surrounded with love too. (Thank God for relatives!!!)
Now that I am a mother, I look back at how my own Mom raised me. How did she know what to do, how to raise us, what to teach, what discipline style to use? I can only imagine what it must have been like for my Mom. She didn't grow up with a mother to take care of her, no mom to help her decide what clothes to wear, no Mom to talk to when suitors came knocking, no Mom to share joys and heartaches with. There was no mom who can guide her and set an example of how to raise children, no mom to protect her when the world becomes too harsh. And yet, despite not having her own mother as an example of how to be a Mom, she still managed to become such a great Mom to us and even to our friends.
When we were younger, she would feed us breakfast one minute, then be off to our office (which was just next door) the next minute. She would bring us to and pick us up from our schools. She was my hairstylist when I was below ten years old. She used to cut it as if she had the pope's round hat on my head as her pattern. My hair looked like a bagul (coconut) and being that I wasn't exactly the prettiest girl then, I was usually mistaken for a boy in my kindergarten days.
She was the disciplinarian, and me being somehow the one who needed the most discipline, was always the one being scolded (which led my young mind to think I was adopted! hehehe). So to me, she was my Hitler, yet I was sooo attached to her. When she'd leave town a few days, I would cry every single day. I used to have this nightmare as a kid of her leaving us, oh how my heart broke to think about it then.
Things took a turn for the better in my teen age years. I think maybe Mom thought she had house-trained me well enough already. We weren't just mother and daughter; we were friends.
Through the years, especially after God called back my Dad, Mom and I became the best of friends. She was my fashion consultant, my constant companion, my harshest critic and loyal adviser. I talked to her about anything and everything. We travelled together, dined, shopped, watched movies, plays and concerts, ballroom danced, and so much more. In her trying moments, I was her sounding board.
Not exactly graduated from being a mom, she is also now a beloved grand mother to Miggy, Audrey and Bric. But as she always says, you never stop being a mother... even when all of us are married, even if we're miles apart.
Mommy Nonie learned how to be a Mom when she had us. I, too, will have my turn to learn more about motherhood as I continue my journey with Bric and our future kids. There are no clear cut rules nor black and white guidelines when it comes to raising your children. Having lived with, and having been raised by my Mom has armed me with a free demonstration on how to be a mother. I just know I will be a better Mom because I have Mom's example to copy from.
Motherhood isn't only learned by example. Nor can it be mastered through textbooks or lectures from so-called psychologists or experts. Motherhood can be taught, theoretically. But in actuality, to be a mother, one just has to trust her inner voice, listen closely to her own and her child's heart, and let her maternal instincts take over.
I asked Mom how she knew how to raise us. She simply replied: You just have to raise them with LOVE. All the rest will follow.
That will be how I intend to raise our children.
Saturday, April 28, 2007
The Old Hag, atbp...
We came from a Homeowner's Associaton meeting here in our village to talk about our Entrance/Exit Gate which was supposed to have been closed temporarily but which, from the looks of it, was becoming permanent. But thanks (kinda) to the Board who listened to what we had to say and took notes of our grievances and suggestions, the gate might not be permanently closed anymore, after all.
Anyway, there was this aged, mestiza lady who looked mataray from the very start. Not one to judge by appearances only, I quietly observed her while listening to what was going on. When at last she finally spoke, it wasn't to say very nice things. Her tone was condescending and mocking and she carried herself with an air of superiority. It was quite unbecoming of an officer serving her equals.
Then I wondered. Who is this woman who speaks so confidently as if she were the boss of the people around her? What makes her treat people that way? Is it her name, her social status, her wealth, her stature, her education, or is it plainly her style, her way of carrying herself and she really does not harbor any ill feelings?
It is hard to read people and judge them by the way they look, or the way they act at a single given time. There are perhaps reasons for the unpleasant way they carry themselves given a certain situation. We really can not tell. Perhaps, under normal circumstances, they are actually nice people, or beneath those tough, suplada exteriors, are sweet and caring men and women, whatever the case may be. I really can not tell.
But her actions of that night got me thinking. There are really people who act like her. There are really people who rub others the wrong way, who carry themselves too confidently, it affects the others around them, who speak with a not so friendly tone, who say things or do things that 'hurt' people or step on them; who seemingly look down at people. Intentionally, or unintentionally. It might be their nature, their upbringing, their mood for that day.
Admittedly, nobody's perfect, and nobody is genuinely 100% nice and sweet. Not everyone can be as patient especially when one is fed up with issues (perhaps the officers received a lot of flak already from some home owners). But it never hurts to make the extra effort at being nicer, being the better person, being more smiling. These efforts are appreciated and spell a big difference especially if you occupy a position of service (and I realize it is a thankless one, at that). So I truly commend the chairperson of that meeting. He was patient and accommodating.
What do we do when we meet people like the old hag? Do we give them a dose of their own medicine? Or do we choose to be the better person and kill them with kindness? Show them that we are the more educated person by treating everyone nicely and equally. Smile more. Perhaps it will warm their hearts. If it doesn't work, we can ignore them and go about our business.
What do we do when we are that old hag? Whew! This calls for some deep introspection. Someone should tell us we're being nasty and then we have to constantly pray to ask God to humble ourselves. We have to pray to the Holy Spirit and Mama Mary for guidance and to melt our icy hearts with the warmth of the love around us.
It isn't easy. We all have times when we're like the old hag, but we have to try to rise above it and strive to be a better, gentler person. I always think a smile is always a good start. And, although difficult, we have to always look at the brighter side, find the good in each person, and magnify that. It is hard to do and I have my own struggles within, but I just have to keep on trying... Lest I become an old hag myself!!!
Anyway, there was this aged, mestiza lady who looked mataray from the very start. Not one to judge by appearances only, I quietly observed her while listening to what was going on. When at last she finally spoke, it wasn't to say very nice things. Her tone was condescending and mocking and she carried herself with an air of superiority. It was quite unbecoming of an officer serving her equals.
Then I wondered. Who is this woman who speaks so confidently as if she were the boss of the people around her? What makes her treat people that way? Is it her name, her social status, her wealth, her stature, her education, or is it plainly her style, her way of carrying herself and she really does not harbor any ill feelings?
It is hard to read people and judge them by the way they look, or the way they act at a single given time. There are perhaps reasons for the unpleasant way they carry themselves given a certain situation. We really can not tell. Perhaps, under normal circumstances, they are actually nice people, or beneath those tough, suplada exteriors, are sweet and caring men and women, whatever the case may be. I really can not tell.
But her actions of that night got me thinking. There are really people who act like her. There are really people who rub others the wrong way, who carry themselves too confidently, it affects the others around them, who speak with a not so friendly tone, who say things or do things that 'hurt' people or step on them; who seemingly look down at people. Intentionally, or unintentionally. It might be their nature, their upbringing, their mood for that day.
Admittedly, nobody's perfect, and nobody is genuinely 100% nice and sweet. Not everyone can be as patient especially when one is fed up with issues (perhaps the officers received a lot of flak already from some home owners). But it never hurts to make the extra effort at being nicer, being the better person, being more smiling. These efforts are appreciated and spell a big difference especially if you occupy a position of service (and I realize it is a thankless one, at that). So I truly commend the chairperson of that meeting. He was patient and accommodating.
What do we do when we meet people like the old hag? Do we give them a dose of their own medicine? Or do we choose to be the better person and kill them with kindness? Show them that we are the more educated person by treating everyone nicely and equally. Smile more. Perhaps it will warm their hearts. If it doesn't work, we can ignore them and go about our business.
What do we do when we are that old hag? Whew! This calls for some deep introspection. Someone should tell us we're being nasty and then we have to constantly pray to ask God to humble ourselves. We have to pray to the Holy Spirit and Mama Mary for guidance and to melt our icy hearts with the warmth of the love around us.
It isn't easy. We all have times when we're like the old hag, but we have to try to rise above it and strive to be a better, gentler person. I always think a smile is always a good start. And, although difficult, we have to always look at the brighter side, find the good in each person, and magnify that. It is hard to do and I have my own struggles within, but I just have to keep on trying... Lest I become an old hag myself!!!
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
We Promise You...
Looking at Bric's pictures when he was just born never fails to tug at my heartstrings. He was such a frail, helpless baby. He was a little boy but he brought with him so much love. I wish Boydee and I can be worthy caretakers of God's son.
I was inspired to write this poem today.
We promise to provide you with your needs
but shower you more with our love.
We promise to hear your words
but listen more to your thoughts.
We promise to watch your actions
but see more your heart.
We promise to teach you life’s lessons
but we will give you room to grow.
We will show you what is right
but allow you to make mistakes
so you can learn from them.
We will guide you however way we can
but we will let you choose your own path.
You are God’s gift to us as He entrusted you
in our care.
We won’t let Him down;
We will always love you, care for you,
protect you, nurture you,
raise you to be His friend.
All these we promise.
I was inspired to write this poem today.
We promise to provide you with your needs
but shower you more with our love.
We promise to hear your words
but listen more to your thoughts.
We promise to watch your actions
but see more your heart.
We promise to teach you life’s lessons
but we will give you room to grow.
We will show you what is right
but allow you to make mistakes
so you can learn from them.
We will guide you however way we can
but we will let you choose your own path.
You are God’s gift to us as He entrusted you
in our care.
We won’t let Him down;
We will always love you, care for you,
protect you, nurture you,
raise you to be His friend.
All these we promise.
Tuesday, April 24, 2007
Cold Shoulder
My Mommy Nonie and I had an argument a few days ago when I was in Cebu. It was more of a silent assault rather than a confrontational disagreement. She gave me the cold shoulder while I tried to reach out awkwardly.
I wasn't quite sure why she got upset. I was guessing it was all about the flower farm tour that went awry. So it went on, the cold treatment, for days even up to the day I left. We were talking but not the normal warm way we talked. Those days, it was stiff and dry and she only addressed me when she really had to.
I said sorry twice for whatever I did that may have hurt her. She wasn't ready to accept the apology. On my end, it was hard to feel guilty, or at least try to, without being quite sure what to be guilty about. This is the hard part about quiet 'wars'. There's so much uncertainty and too much stress keeping things bottled inside.
While at the airport, I texted goodbye, sorry and thanked her for everything. Finally, when I got back here in Manila, she texted and gave me the reason why she was upset. I didn't quite agree with her reason. But to keep the peace, I said sorry. I also said that hopefully, IF it happens again, please do tell me so I can realize my mistake and make amends. She accepted my apologies but didn't want to discuss it anymore.
It is tough to be a parent. When I read my Mom's text, I could feel the pain she was feeling. But I also wanted to say to her that it really didn't happen that way, that she took how I reacted the wrong way. I was always the vocal child in the family while my brothers were the quieter ones. I usually voiced out my opinion and feelings, especially if I think I have a reason, and then forgive and forget about it after. End of story. Garbage in, garbage out.
But I guess, no matter how right we, children, think we are, or how 'petty' our parents may seem to be, it shouldn't give us the right to talk back, or 'scold' them. No matter how much smarter or successful we think we've become, or how outdated they seem to be, we should always treat them with utmost respect. They have raised us, sacrificed and dedicated their lives for us so that we can get to be where we are now.
So, it really didn't matter whether I was right or wrong, or whether she had a point or not, after all is said and done, I am the daughter, she is my mother; and I shall have to be the one to humble myself and say sorry.
There is no such thing as a perfect family. No such thing as a perfect parent, nor a perfect daughter. We can only strive to be the best in the roles we play. Forgive each other, humble oneself, learn, move on. There will always be arguments, mistakes, unintentional errors; but at the bottom of it all, there will always be love, because we are family.
Now that I am a parent, I can only pray that Bric will be a better child, and more importantly, that I will be a better parent.
I wasn't quite sure why she got upset. I was guessing it was all about the flower farm tour that went awry. So it went on, the cold treatment, for days even up to the day I left. We were talking but not the normal warm way we talked. Those days, it was stiff and dry and she only addressed me when she really had to.
I said sorry twice for whatever I did that may have hurt her. She wasn't ready to accept the apology. On my end, it was hard to feel guilty, or at least try to, without being quite sure what to be guilty about. This is the hard part about quiet 'wars'. There's so much uncertainty and too much stress keeping things bottled inside.
While at the airport, I texted goodbye, sorry and thanked her for everything. Finally, when I got back here in Manila, she texted and gave me the reason why she was upset. I didn't quite agree with her reason. But to keep the peace, I said sorry. I also said that hopefully, IF it happens again, please do tell me so I can realize my mistake and make amends. She accepted my apologies but didn't want to discuss it anymore.
It is tough to be a parent. When I read my Mom's text, I could feel the pain she was feeling. But I also wanted to say to her that it really didn't happen that way, that she took how I reacted the wrong way. I was always the vocal child in the family while my brothers were the quieter ones. I usually voiced out my opinion and feelings, especially if I think I have a reason, and then forgive and forget about it after. End of story. Garbage in, garbage out.
But I guess, no matter how right we, children, think we are, or how 'petty' our parents may seem to be, it shouldn't give us the right to talk back, or 'scold' them. No matter how much smarter or successful we think we've become, or how outdated they seem to be, we should always treat them with utmost respect. They have raised us, sacrificed and dedicated their lives for us so that we can get to be where we are now.
So, it really didn't matter whether I was right or wrong, or whether she had a point or not, after all is said and done, I am the daughter, she is my mother; and I shall have to be the one to humble myself and say sorry.
There is no such thing as a perfect family. No such thing as a perfect parent, nor a perfect daughter. We can only strive to be the best in the roles we play. Forgive each other, humble oneself, learn, move on. There will always be arguments, mistakes, unintentional errors; but at the bottom of it all, there will always be love, because we are family.
Now that I am a parent, I can only pray that Bric will be a better child, and more importantly, that I will be a better parent.
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
Happiness
I just started a new blog, The Accidental Gourmand, and had May, my SDCF, take a look at it. She enjoyed it but she preferred this one. It had more depth, she said. She said she was expecting a lot of entries now that I'm a mother. I told her I tried to write a really moving essay about my feelings now especially towards our little Bric but everytime I tried, all the words just become understatements.
Bric's entry into our life was long awaited and much prayed for. So when he finally came into our world, we, Boydee and I, were so overwhelmed. Just seeing him, sleeping, when he was just a few days old, warmed my heart. When he whimpered (that's how he cried before... oh so softly), my whole heart went to him. He was just so tender, so fragile, so small (at that time).
During the first mass Boydee and I attended after Bric's birth, we both cried profusely. God had been so good to us all these years. And now, He's given us more! He gave us the most beautiful gift. He entrusted to us for our care and love, this beautiful little creature, this baby, His son.
For the first few weeks, I was a paranoid mother. Any little thing that made him seem different, I would make a fuss and start praying my novenas to Sto. Nino and our Lady. It was a good thing Boydee was calm and stood as my pillar of comfort.
Now, at four months old, he's a picture of a healthy, happy baby boy! No more jitters (thank God!!!), no more eye infection, no more jaundice, no more colic! Still, I know as a mother, I will forever be worried of little things, and God knows that I am forever praying to Him to watch over Bric and keep him always safe from harm's way.
Each day is a day of discovery for him and for Boydee and me. How soon time flies and how fast he grows! At a month and a half, he showed off his social smile. At two months, he started trying to talk. Eversince then, he's been gurgling, cooing, laughing and making noises with his mouth, as if wanting to talk. He is just such an adorable, smiling, funny baby. My heart just goes fuzzy and it just melts at the sight of him. So, this is motherhood. So, this is happiness.
Bric's entry into our life was long awaited and much prayed for. So when he finally came into our world, we, Boydee and I, were so overwhelmed. Just seeing him, sleeping, when he was just a few days old, warmed my heart. When he whimpered (that's how he cried before... oh so softly), my whole heart went to him. He was just so tender, so fragile, so small (at that time).
During the first mass Boydee and I attended after Bric's birth, we both cried profusely. God had been so good to us all these years. And now, He's given us more! He gave us the most beautiful gift. He entrusted to us for our care and love, this beautiful little creature, this baby, His son.
For the first few weeks, I was a paranoid mother. Any little thing that made him seem different, I would make a fuss and start praying my novenas to Sto. Nino and our Lady. It was a good thing Boydee was calm and stood as my pillar of comfort.
Now, at four months old, he's a picture of a healthy, happy baby boy! No more jitters (thank God!!!), no more eye infection, no more jaundice, no more colic! Still, I know as a mother, I will forever be worried of little things, and God knows that I am forever praying to Him to watch over Bric and keep him always safe from harm's way.
Each day is a day of discovery for him and for Boydee and me. How soon time flies and how fast he grows! At a month and a half, he showed off his social smile. At two months, he started trying to talk. Eversince then, he's been gurgling, cooing, laughing and making noises with his mouth, as if wanting to talk. He is just such an adorable, smiling, funny baby. My heart just goes fuzzy and it just melts at the sight of him. So, this is motherhood. So, this is happiness.
Wednesday, January 17, 2007
Labor and Delivery
Christmas came early for us in 2006. It came on December 13 upon the birth of our first miracle, Rafael "Bric" U. Dizon IV. He was supposed to be due on Christmas Day but he wanted to come out early so he may spend his first Christmas with the whole kaboodle. So December 13 it was.
I was scheduled for a check up with Dr. John Artenos on the 12th. The night before that, Mommy Nonie just arrived from the Philippines to be with me when I give birth. Apparently, it seemed, her arrival was all Bric was waiting for. Mamalyn and Lolo Boy were already here by then, and, of course, the other most important person in his life, future daddy Boydee.
12 December, 1:30pm. Mommy Nonie and Boydee accompanied me to what was to be my last pre natal visit. On that visit, Dr. Artenos said my cervix had already dilated to 4 cm and that I should be admitted to the hospital since I might give birth anytime soon. I panicked... I wasn't ready to give birth yet. In my mind, I had thought I would give birth some time past the 15th. Heck! I hadn't even packed for the hospital yet! But Dr. Artenos had his way. I wasn't allowed to go home anymore and was sent straight to the Maternity section and to a room. Mom stayed with me while Boydee went home to pack my things. He was initially calm but kinda got nervous when he was about to leave the hospital. I was still psyching myself to be ready.
Late afternoon. The family started coming and checking how I was - Daddy Boy, Mommy Shalene, Lola Nene, Rondic and Lai with their new 4th, Robyn, Tita Sanne and Tito Lito, Tita Belen and Roc. What a great support system I had! They stayed til evening. Mommy Nonie wanted to sleep with us but we thought it would be too taxing for her. They all went home while Boydee and I stayed. When they left, we prayed the rosary together for God to be with us throughout my delivery just as He had been all throughout my pregnancy. Our Mommies and the family prayed the rosary at home too for my safe delivery. With so many praying for me, how can things go wrong?!?
13 December, 12 am. I wasn't going into labor on my own so Dr. A put me on pytocin to start my labor going. Prior to that, the nurses put on the IV which was an inconvenience, and two monitors on my tummy-one to monitor my contractions, the other to monitor baby's movement.
3-4am, or thereabouts. Per the monitors, I started my labor already but I wasn't feeling too much pain. Nevertheless, a few minutes after, the anesthesiologist came by to administer the epidural, which I soon found out, is a laboring woman's bestest friend! When the epidural took effect, everything was just numb from my tummy down. So, they put on the catheter, and checked me from time to time. They could've poked down under all they like, I couldn't care. Honey, I couldn't feel the pain!
At around 5 am, I started having chills and became nauseous. The nurses said it was all part of the labor process. They also reported that although baby's heartbeat was ok, his activity wasn't what they hoped it would be. They transferred the monitors inside my uterus to better monitor baby's movements. Dr. A came by and checked on me. He scratched baby's head to check if he would respond well and start him moving. Baby would respond initially then would get back to slow movements. This was done two times in separate instances.
By close to 6am, Dr. A decided it was best to open me up and get the baby out before his activity becomes weaker and weaker. He didn't want to risk 'losing' the baby. He asked for our permission to do a caesarian section delivery. As if I wasn't dazed enough, I panicked even more. I hadn't read much about delivering by c/s because everything had been normal, but I guess God had other plans. I asked Dr. A how much time we had to decide whether to take a chance on the normal delivery or to do the c/s. He said, "the moment I propose it" (which was actually now). So we didn't have much choice but trust the doctor whom God sent. So Boydee said a definite yes while I gave a half hearted one. But that was enough for Dr. A. Everything was rush rush from that time on. They prepped me while Boydee called our Moms. While they sent me to the operating room, Boydee moved all our stuff to another room we were transferred to and put on the operating room attire - pants and mask and all.
6am plus. Inside the operating room, they put a "curtain" somewhere on my chest so I wouldn't see what they were doing to me. Boydee stepped inside with his camera. He was covered except for his eyes. They opened me up and took baby out. Boydee said his umbilical cord was wrapped around his neck which explained the slow activity. On the first attempt of taking the cord out, it snapped back to baby. On the second try, the cord gave in and baby was free!!! They recorded his birth at 6:19 am. He was 6 lbs. and 8.3 ounces and 20.5" long. After cleaning him up, a nurse brought baby near me so I could see God's big little gift. It wasn't as emotional as I pictured it to be, with uncontrollable tears of joy, because I was half conscious. Still, it was a happy, memorable moment as I got my first glimpse of our baby.
The rest of the day, I was down and knocked out. We had so many visitors but I was mostly asleep and too weak to talk. I wasn't allowed to talk either because Mommies said that would fill my tummy with gas. So I slept through most of the day, only waking to breastfeed. It was a wonderful feeling to finally hold Bric in my arms and feed him. He was so frail and helpless. I couldn't believe this little creature was the one I carried within me for 9 months. He was finally out and we are finally a family.
The rest of the days I recuperated. The stitches and the womb part were achy and sore. My legs were still bloated. I was only able to walk on the 2nd recovery day. I thought the pain would never end. My boobs were also starting to get sore from breastfeeding. I was pretty weak. I am just so grateful Boydee stepped up and turned out to be a great daddy. He changed Bric's diapers, learned how to swaddle him, cradled him in his arms while I was mostly in bed. He took care of me too and so did Mommy Nonie.
A month after, I am stronger and the pain has subsided so much. The bleeding has stopped, the sterile tapes have been taken out, and I'm back to most of my normal activities. My carpal tunnel syndrome still remains though and it's giving me a hard time especially when carrying Bric. My tummy is still kinda droopy and lumpy. Have to work on that when we get back home. All in all, I think I recovered well. Thank God the pain has passed.
For now, the experience and the pain is still fresh in my mind but looking back, and seeing Bric now, all the pain and the discomfort I went through was worth it. I would give up my life for Bric or go through pain to save him from it. He is our borrowed treasure from God, and we will take care of him and raise him the best way we can. He is God's early Christmas gift to us!
Side story: When Boydee called our Moms that I was about to have a c/section that early morning, they rushed to the hospital to be with us. When they arrived, they immediately went to the room and saw Boydee there. They frantically asked where I was and how I was doing. A nurse was there leaning on the incubator staring wide-eyed at them with a look of disbelief on her face. She couldn't contain herself much longer so she asked, "Aren't you even going to look at the baby?!" There, inside the incubator was baby Rafael. Our Moms didn't know that the delivery was over and that baby was already there inside. When they realized that, they rushed to see baby Bric. :)
12 December, 1:30pm. Mommy Nonie and Boydee accompanied me to what was to be my last pre natal visit. On that visit, Dr. Artenos said my cervix had already dilated to 4 cm and that I should be admitted to the hospital since I might give birth anytime soon. I panicked... I wasn't ready to give birth yet. In my mind, I had thought I would give birth some time past the 15th. Heck! I hadn't even packed for the hospital yet! But Dr. Artenos had his way. I wasn't allowed to go home anymore and was sent straight to the Maternity section and to a room. Mom stayed with me while Boydee went home to pack my things. He was initially calm but kinda got nervous when he was about to leave the hospital. I was still psyching myself to be ready.
Late afternoon. The family started coming and checking how I was - Daddy Boy, Mommy Shalene, Lola Nene, Rondic and Lai with their new 4th, Robyn, Tita Sanne and Tito Lito, Tita Belen and Roc. What a great support system I had! They stayed til evening. Mommy Nonie wanted to sleep with us but we thought it would be too taxing for her. They all went home while Boydee and I stayed. When they left, we prayed the rosary together for God to be with us throughout my delivery just as He had been all throughout my pregnancy. Our Mommies and the family prayed the rosary at home too for my safe delivery. With so many praying for me, how can things go wrong?!?
13 December, 12 am. I wasn't going into labor on my own so Dr. A put me on pytocin to start my labor going. Prior to that, the nurses put on the IV which was an inconvenience, and two monitors on my tummy-one to monitor my contractions, the other to monitor baby's movement.
3-4am, or thereabouts. Per the monitors, I started my labor already but I wasn't feeling too much pain. Nevertheless, a few minutes after, the anesthesiologist came by to administer the epidural, which I soon found out, is a laboring woman's bestest friend! When the epidural took effect, everything was just numb from my tummy down. So, they put on the catheter, and checked me from time to time. They could've poked down under all they like, I couldn't care. Honey, I couldn't feel the pain!
At around 5 am, I started having chills and became nauseous. The nurses said it was all part of the labor process. They also reported that although baby's heartbeat was ok, his activity wasn't what they hoped it would be. They transferred the monitors inside my uterus to better monitor baby's movements. Dr. A came by and checked on me. He scratched baby's head to check if he would respond well and start him moving. Baby would respond initially then would get back to slow movements. This was done two times in separate instances.
By close to 6am, Dr. A decided it was best to open me up and get the baby out before his activity becomes weaker and weaker. He didn't want to risk 'losing' the baby. He asked for our permission to do a caesarian section delivery. As if I wasn't dazed enough, I panicked even more. I hadn't read much about delivering by c/s because everything had been normal, but I guess God had other plans. I asked Dr. A how much time we had to decide whether to take a chance on the normal delivery or to do the c/s. He said, "the moment I propose it" (which was actually now). So we didn't have much choice but trust the doctor whom God sent. So Boydee said a definite yes while I gave a half hearted one. But that was enough for Dr. A. Everything was rush rush from that time on. They prepped me while Boydee called our Moms. While they sent me to the operating room, Boydee moved all our stuff to another room we were transferred to and put on the operating room attire - pants and mask and all.
6am plus. Inside the operating room, they put a "curtain" somewhere on my chest so I wouldn't see what they were doing to me. Boydee stepped inside with his camera. He was covered except for his eyes. They opened me up and took baby out. Boydee said his umbilical cord was wrapped around his neck which explained the slow activity. On the first attempt of taking the cord out, it snapped back to baby. On the second try, the cord gave in and baby was free!!! They recorded his birth at 6:19 am. He was 6 lbs. and 8.3 ounces and 20.5" long. After cleaning him up, a nurse brought baby near me so I could see God's big little gift. It wasn't as emotional as I pictured it to be, with uncontrollable tears of joy, because I was half conscious. Still, it was a happy, memorable moment as I got my first glimpse of our baby.
The rest of the day, I was down and knocked out. We had so many visitors but I was mostly asleep and too weak to talk. I wasn't allowed to talk either because Mommies said that would fill my tummy with gas. So I slept through most of the day, only waking to breastfeed. It was a wonderful feeling to finally hold Bric in my arms and feed him. He was so frail and helpless. I couldn't believe this little creature was the one I carried within me for 9 months. He was finally out and we are finally a family.
The rest of the days I recuperated. The stitches and the womb part were achy and sore. My legs were still bloated. I was only able to walk on the 2nd recovery day. I thought the pain would never end. My boobs were also starting to get sore from breastfeeding. I was pretty weak. I am just so grateful Boydee stepped up and turned out to be a great daddy. He changed Bric's diapers, learned how to swaddle him, cradled him in his arms while I was mostly in bed. He took care of me too and so did Mommy Nonie.
A month after, I am stronger and the pain has subsided so much. The bleeding has stopped, the sterile tapes have been taken out, and I'm back to most of my normal activities. My carpal tunnel syndrome still remains though and it's giving me a hard time especially when carrying Bric. My tummy is still kinda droopy and lumpy. Have to work on that when we get back home. All in all, I think I recovered well. Thank God the pain has passed.
For now, the experience and the pain is still fresh in my mind but looking back, and seeing Bric now, all the pain and the discomfort I went through was worth it. I would give up my life for Bric or go through pain to save him from it. He is our borrowed treasure from God, and we will take care of him and raise him the best way we can. He is God's early Christmas gift to us!
Side story: When Boydee called our Moms that I was about to have a c/section that early morning, they rushed to the hospital to be with us. When they arrived, they immediately went to the room and saw Boydee there. They frantically asked where I was and how I was doing. A nurse was there leaning on the incubator staring wide-eyed at them with a look of disbelief on her face. She couldn't contain herself much longer so she asked, "Aren't you even going to look at the baby?!" There, inside the incubator was baby Rafael. Our Moms didn't know that the delivery was over and that baby was already there inside. When they realized that, they rushed to see baby Bric. :)
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